Figuring out who supports you (and who doesn’t)

 

It’s always hard starting up your own business. If you are taking a huge leap and don’t have another job to support you then it can be quite scary and there couldn’t be a more important time to have the support from those you are closest to. 

Having that support is what will get you through the times when you wonder why you are doing this. But sometimes we don’t always get the support we need from the people we would like it from the most. For most of us, this is something we have to learn the hard way. But I want to let you know how to be prepared for this and to look out for the signs so that you can spot the people who may not support you.

I have been blessed with a really supportive family. Even though I know that my mum would still love to see me qualify as a solicitor and sometimes my dad is a bit hard with his advice, but no matter what, they support me 100%. The most important thing to them is that I am doing something that makes me happy. When I published my first blog post last week I was really nervous about who was reading it and what people would think and my mum was there reminding me that it didn’t really matter what people thought, and my dad will listen to me go on about my ideas for hours.

I wish I could say the same for some of my friends but since I started on my new journey I haven’t heard from the friends I was closest to at all,and they haven’t even liked any of my pages. And that’s ok because that says more about their character than anyone else’s. The truth is, there will always be someone who doesn’t support you no matter how much of a good friend you think they are.

Looking back I have noticed that these people never really did support me and I have spotted five main signs to look out for so that you can spot the people who may not support you:

  • They are only interested in something if it benefits them. It’s their way or the highway! And when you suggest to do something they have some excuse to not do it or they suggest something else because they would rather do what they want instead. They never consider what you want to do.
  • They turn everything into a competition. You can’t have or do anything without them having something better, or them having a better experience than you.
  • They make every conversation about themselves. No matter what the conversation is, it could be something really serious or you could be seeking advice on something and they will always manage to turn the conversation back to themselves.
  • They disappear when you are going through a tough time. They’re always the first ones there when everything is good and it comes to going out and having a good time but as soon as you are going through a tough time you don’t hear from them.
  • When something good happens, like you get a new job or a new car, they never comment on it or congratulate you.

So if you know anyone who shows any of these signs then maybe they won’t support you like you expect them to.

It is usually the people you are closest to that feel the most threatened by your success, they would rather not support you than risk being left behind. I am not saying that is what would happen but that may be how they feel, whether they know it or not. Or it may be that they are not happy with their own lives. If you believe in yourself and your goals and you are truly happy with what you are doing then you never feel threatened by other people’s success. I love nothing more than to see other people win and if you have that mindset then that is what makes you a winner.

So don’t pay attention to those who don’t support you, there will always be someone who will have something to say, or have nothing to say. Just stay focused and keep doing what you are doing. Surround yourself with people who you know support you 100%. If it makes you happy then that is all that matters because at the end of the day you are doing what you are doing for you, not for anyone else.

And I will leave you with this quote!img_1167

I would love to hear your stories and comments below!

Chelsi x

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